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Those differences, and my advice for shy nerdy females, will be the subject of another post.(That’s the thing about blogging: in for a penny, in for a post.) I struggle always to be ready to change my views in light of new arguments and evidence.Two weeks ago, prompted by a commenter named Amy, I wrote by far the most personal thing I’ve ever made public—what’s now being referred to in some places as just “comment 171.” My thinking was: I’m giving up a privacy that I won’t regain for as long as I live, opening myself to ridicule, doing the blog equivalent of a queen-and-two-rook sacrifice.But at least—and this is what matters—no one will ever again be able to question the depth of my feminist ideals.

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I believe this is a complicated problem best approached with charity: we want win-win solutions, where is made to feel despised because of who they are.How to help all the young male nerds I meet who suffer from this problem, in a way that passes feminist muster, and that triggers the world’s sympathy rather than outrage, is a problem that interests me as much as P vs. On top of that, these women also have additional difficulties that come with being women!At the same time, I also think there are crucial differences between the two cases—at least in the world as it currently exists—which might make the shy-nerdy-male problem vastly harder to solve than the shy-nerdy-female one.Ironically, Aronson [sic] actually writes a lot like Dworkin- he writes from pain felt and relived and wrenched from the intimate core of himself, and because of that his writing is powerfully honest, but also flawed …What fascinates me about Aaronson’s piece, in which there was such raw, honest suffering, was that there was not one mention of women in any respect other than how they might relieve him from his pain by taking pity, or educating him differently. Aaronson is obviously a compassionate, well-meaning and highly intelligent man I’ll have more to say about Penny’s arguments in a later post—where I agree and where I part ways from her—but there’s one factual point I should clear up now.

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